"Love Is A Choice"

Love is a Choice

True love is not something we trip into and out of easily. God's love for us endures all things and does not change, even when we do. He doesn't love us for measuring up to a certain standard. He loves us because He is love himself. There is not one thing he does that is not motivated by love. When we fail, He does not reject us, but in his compassion reaches out to restore us. Though he sees the hardness, blindness and hypocrisy in our hearts, he still loves us. He loves us enough to not overlook these things, because he knows they will destroy us.

He loves us with a consuming, passionate, holy, jealous and gentle love. He loves us so much that he continually offers us forgiveness, comfort, encouragement, peace and joy. Finally, Jesus showed that He loves us more than his own life when he laid it down for us.

Because He loves us in this way, so we also are to love each other. Nowhere is God's love for us better illustrated than in marriage. "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things that she might be holy and faultless. Even so husbands should love their wives as (being in a sense) their own bodies.

He who loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and carefully protects and cherishes it, as Christ does the church. We are member’s parts of his body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning (the relation of) Christ and the church.

However, let each man of you without exception love his wife (being in a sense) his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him and loves and admires him exceedingly" (Ephesians 5: 25-33, Amplified Bible).

I'd love to hear how your sharing and showing Love to Your Mate.

"This Thing Call Love".

This Thing Called Love

What is this thing called love?! There are a million different answers to the question.

Don’t you just love a great love story? I do! I enjoy the fantasy of today's romantic comedies found on TV, in Movies and Soap Operas; I like escapism as much as the next person. But, let's get real! Let's separate fact from fiction; what you see on TV and in the Movies is not real love and it never will be. I want to talk you about the heart-to-heart kind of love.

I'll going to share a true and lasting love story with you; it’s the treasured love story of my Grandparents Richard and Birdie Bass. My Grandparents had a 67 year good ole fashion meet you at the school dance love affair which stood the test of time.

They were born and raised in the Texas countryside with and old fashion value system. On many occasions my Papa and I would have our one-on-one heart-to-heart talks and he'd tell of his love at first sight encounter. He saw my Grandmother from across the room at a church choir practice; he said he knew in his heart she was the one for him. Just so happened that my Grandmothers brother and Grandfather were good friends, but didn’t know he had a younger sister. My Grandfather told her brother how much he wanted to meet her and take her to the school dance. My Grandmother Brother said it was ok with him but he would have to ask their Daddy and then ask her. My Grandfather was chivalrous and respectful he got permission.

Love at first sight did it exist for my Grandfather and the rest is a 67 year history of love. My Papa eventually asked my Grandmother to the school dance and of course she said yes. Twenty-five cents was a lot of money in the 1930’s, but he purchased her ticket and reaped a lifetime of love and true happiness.

I loved my Grandparents they were loving and kind to us and we maintained a close relationship. For years I’d sit at my Grandfather's feet and listen to him impart wisdom but my knowing and understanding of all that he said would come years later. My Grandparents adored each other she respected him and he took care of her. I saw an enduring love that's almost non-extsistant in today's society.

Texas is a beautiful countryside with all four seasons. The weather changed often without warning and so it is in marriage, they loved through all kinds of weather. They loved through severe electrical storms and various weather conditions. I remember the sudden weather changes well; one late Sunday evening my Grandparents ask my sister and I to pack-up the car. It's was time to leave Itasca and headed back to Waco. The Sky was overcast filled with heavy dark cloud but no rain in sight.

As we begin our journey back to Waco it started to rain, within minutes the rain became violent. It rained so hard the car was being tossed from side to side we begin to hear the thunder roaring and see the lightning strikes, it was frighten. My Grandmother begin to talk to my Grandfather he quitely reassured her that everything was going to be alright. I recall that day as if it were yesterday. I was sitting in the backseat behind my Grandmother and my sister was sitting behind my Grandfather and Papa kept kept telling us that we'll need to drive through the storm and that everything was going to alright. We drive through that storm and made it out just fine.

They love through the great depression, sickness and disease and the deaths of love ones and the births of beautiful babies. They love through High School and College Graduations. Their love was strong it endured my Grandmother's illness, eventually her illiness put her in a Senior Citizen Home and yes my Papa was right there to stand by her side. They committed to love from the start their love was real and endured to the end.

I watched my Grandfather at 85 drive to see my Grandmother each day, he could barely see over the steering wheel. I put a booster pillow in the driver seat, this allowed Papa to see the road better. Papa was determined to get to her no matter what. He'd spend hours at Ms. Birdie bedside holding her hands and stroking her forehand. He was a wonderful comfort to her. Due to her illness she could no longer speak but she responded with her eyes she understood his love.

I'd visit my Grandmother often. Upon my arrival my Grandfather was in his favorite spot sitting by her bedside reading her healing scriptures from the Bible. They had the kind of love that looked passed her weight and dress size. Theirs was the kind of love that looked pass my Grandmothers partial balled head and the fragile grey strands that remained.

Theirs was the kind of love that looked passed how much money was in their bank account. Theirs was an enduring and endearing love. Theirs was a heart-to-heart kind of love that made you sacrifice your own needs for the needs of your Children.

Their marriage was not based on convenience or obligation or career advancement it was genuine, it was pure love. Their love was inspiring they had a special way of communicating not just talking. Their love was founded on biblical principles. They trusted each other and they were patience with each other, my Grandmother preceded my Grandfather in death in June 2001.

After her passing Papa talked often of his love for her; his eye would fill with tears as he spoke of how much he missed her love. And at other times he’d break out with a big smile as if he knew a secret; he cherished her. My Grandparents has that's real thing call love.

I'd like to hear about your heart-to-heart.

Your Health Is Your Wealth

It's time to nurture you. If you're committed to change replace the hard-headed discipline with self-compassion. Every resolution to change begins with a decision. You've vowed to change each year but you realize there are energy drainers in your life that make it tough to change. So what's a girl to do? Dig it that's what, use every resource you've got and get busy.

You're ready to honor your longing commitment for healthier and happier you. Why wait to the New Year to start change? Were close to the last quarter of 2011 you can start right where you are. Deep down you know you're up to the challenge.

However, I must warn you that after your initial enthusiasm wears off and you hit your first setback don't go changing your mind. Yes, you'll hear those old nagging thoughts in your head. "What's wrong with me"? Why can't I make this simple change?" The louder voice of self-doubt will try and creeps in, don't listen. Forget the self doubt it's all about love and making you the number one priority.

Bottom-line is your health is your wealth and you should take proactive steps in making health your first and number one priority. I have been a caregiver for my Mom for many years and I've seen firsthand the ravaging effects of heart disease (Stroke) through the eyes of a caregiver. Nothing can prepare you for what you will walk through. But taking care of you is a good start.

Watching the hospice nurses moving in and out of my Mom's home gives me an up-close and personal look how serious taking care of you should be. It's not just seeing the nurses but interacting with them from week to week and hearing their prognosis and watching my Mom's declining health.

I see firsthand how much medication is ordered and taken on a daily base. My Mom's condition has declined over the years and it has taken its toll emotionally, mentally and physically on her and on our family. Your life is never the same after you lose your health.

As you step out to pursue your life's goal and dreams, we must first take a look at our own well being. Without good health you have nothing, you can dreams big and aspirer to do great things but without the wealth of your good health what's the point?

My aim is simple and that is to inspire you to take better care of you. If not you, then who?

I like to hear how you're taking a proactive approach to your health and well being.

"Finding Your Way"

Wondering whether you're headed in the right direction? I'm glad you stopped by to chat. Feeling like you've lost your way? Let's talk! It's time for change.

What’s holding you back? "Getting Unstuck" Break out of your shell, get out of that rut it’s time.

Pick a new activity; try something you’ve been thinking about for a while. Up for a quick weekend getaway? Perhaps, a new sport is what you crave? My point is to create a new space for yourself, get still and get quiet and listen for your answers.

"Listen" Underneath your mental chatter, you have a clear instinct of how you want your life to look. Get in touch with your inner wisdom, let go of the way you think things are supposed to be.

"Have Faith" Trust that the circumstances in your life are for your development and remember your circumstances are short term temporary and subject to change.

"Notice" The are many gifts in your life. As you work to clarify what's important and who's important in your life, you will have to let some things go! Of course I speak from an experience that was the old way of doings things; those thoughts patterns no longer fit your life that's was then; but this is now. Those old thought patterns worked for where you were, but not for where you’re going.

Don't be afraid to let go of what's not working in your life, it's time to nurture the new you.

I'd like to hear how and what you changed.

"Be Kind To Yourself A Change is Coming"

If being hard on yourself is counter-productive why do we do it? Because we don't love ourselves unconditionally, but we require others to love us unconditionally and not point out our flaws.

Why is that internal critic still playing in your head? It's time to stop the blame game, the shame game and get rid of the guilt and fear of not being perfect. It's time to change the voice in your head; a change is coming get ready.

You can change a negative pattern of thinking or behavior with some self-love. Get ready to replace that habit with a positive message. You can do it! You're mistaking the behavior you want to change for the person that you are, rather than seeing it for what it is. That old nagging habit doesn't serve you anymore. It’s time to cultivate some self-love, ask me how I know?!

1. Love: Acknowledge that you deserve health and happiness and that you're worth the effort it takes to make a positive change.

2. Remind yourself how the specific change you make will support your well-being.

3. Joy: Give yourself credit and celebrate any positive actions you have taken to support yourself in changing, you can do it.

Make big strides in your life by setting small goals. Instead of pledging yourself to an ideal make a commitment to a task you can realistically complete. The best approach to a change is to start where you are.

The path to transformation involves many small steps. Experience each step you make as a positive one. I’d like to hear how you’re changing!

True Success What Is It?

Society points and paints a picture of what it means to be successful. Some believe that success is measured by what one attains in life such as wealth, luxury cars, walking the red carpets and associating with the right people.

Perhaps having a high profile career is success to you? There is nothing wrong with achieving and making your mark in the world. Those external achievements have their place; however those external things can’t take the place of a loving relationship with God. Matthew 6:33-34 is a principle found in the Word of God.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness and all these things shall be add unto you. V,34 Therefore take no thought for the morrow for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

Society's portrayal of success is often damaging to those who don't know any better, their lives have not been rooted in the Word of God; so there's a false perception of what's real and where illusion comes in.

Success comes when you're rooted in God's Word. Knowing comes when you standing on a firm biblical foundation. A biblical foundation gives you structure and that foundation keeps things in perspective. Once you understand that, it's easy to manage fame, power, or wealth and you're clear on your purpose for wealth. It's all about helping others and building the Kingdom of God.

How do you define Success? I define success as using my God given ability and passion to help others find their gifts.

We all know at least one person that has achieved the world’s standard of living. But do they have joy? I'm speaking about the kind of joy that's not tied to a circumstance or an upcoming event. People are searching and looking for what's real but each time they've come up empty.

There's nothing wrong with success you can have it as long as it doesn't have you. I'd like to hear your success story?

"We All Have A Reason To Be Grateful

Even in the lean times you have a reason to be grateful. It's been a very hectic week and my schedule was been packed with meetings; answering telephone calls and responding to income emails. Additionally, I'd produced and interviewed three amazing guests for our "Women in Jazz" series for CoffeeTalk Jazz Radio and there was the post show wrap-up for each guest.

CoffeeTalk Jazz Radio is hugely popular and to produce at my level takes hours of research and high energy. Before tackling another piece of paper, I decided to step back for a few moments and take a break. I called my sister for energy and to check-in as we often do throughout the day. I wasn't prepared for what she'd share she begin to talk about our family friend Yahcee.

I heard her voice but I could hardly ingest what she was saying. I repeated her words to be sure I was clear. I felt my voice crack as I grasped for air. My sister shared Yahcee’s grave diagnosis of "Brain Cancer".

Yachee has been a wonderful friend and a part of our family for the past 16 years. We haven't seen or heard from Yachee in months, that was unusual. I'd ask my sister every few weeks about Yachee her answer was always the same. "No I have not heard from him" she'd say. We thought he might be away on vacation he traveled extensively after his retirement.

The tiredness I felt earlier left me as my sister told me of Yahcee's fourth surgery to remove a large brain tumor. I couldn’t believe it! I asked her how Yachee was doing she said he's been out of the hospital and home for a week, he didn't sound like himself but he was grateful to be alive.

There are many ways to measure gratefulness and success. I choose to measure my wealth by the breath and health in my body. We all have a reason to be grateful and my number one reason is that I'm alive.

I'd like to hear your reason for being grateful!